This week has been an interesting week for me as it’s it has marked the start of Spring ~ yes, the cricket season is well and truly underway! Now for those of you who aren’t cricket widows this means not only does one’s partner disappear for most of Saturday and sometimes Sunday, there is also junior training (as there is another coming through the cricket ranks) and of course the all important watching to be done!
The hint of sarcasm that you might detect in my tone is just a little tease, however, there was a time when I did resent my husband carving out such a big chunk of time out of our week just for himself, after all when did I get that opportunity with working & looking after three small children? There simply wasn’t time ~ or was it that I just didn’t make time?
Over the past week I had numerous conversations with my clients about making time for themselves to simply recharge, to look after themselves. So many of us are bad at it. I have to confess I am still not a graduating from this lesson with flying colours, but I am aware that when I don’t, it is my choice not to and that the reasons I don’t are simply excuses, I could, if I really wanted.
So what is stopping us? Well for one I am a firm believer that we approach this in entirely the wrong way. We often talk about ‘non work/family’ activities or the like as ‘me time’ or ‘time out’ as though it’s something that we shouldn’t really be doing, that somehow it is selfish, that other things really ought to come first. It then becomes very difficult to prioritise these ‘events’ over other activities, because they feel non essential, like they are a treat or an indulgence. The second, in my experience of myself and the clients that I work with, is that anything that is linked to looking after ourselves, in whatever way, is the ultimate selfish act, we should be looking after everyone else first, then and only then look after ourselves if there is enough time and energy left for us.
To me, this is completely the wrong way around, a friend of mine once said to me ‘you can’t feed others from your plate, if your own plate is empty’ and that analogy has stuck with me and I have shared it countless times. If we don’t allow ourselves time to recharge, to look after ourselves, then there will come a point where we have nothing left to give and at this point we are of no use to anyone, it becomes impossible to after others then?
My view is that this should be more important than brushing your teeth or eating your 5 a day, you wouldn’t expect your mobile phone to last for a week without recharging it, yet we expect ourselves to get through our busy week running on often 0% with no plans to change it – often starting the following week in exactly the same state. When we look at it like this it becomes a no brainer, of course we need to be fully charged to be raring to go, it simply just makes sense. So this week, think about you having a power pack within you, a power pack that needs to be recharged on a regular basis, and make a commitment to make sure that yours is on full charge before you start each week. Then just notice the difference it makes.
Andrea Morrison is a Transformational Life Coach, Hypnotherapist & Speaker (andreamorrison.co.uk) and is author of The Feel Good Factor in 30 days.